A.D.D.I.S.O.N.: MY ADDICTION APPARENTLY

Friday, April 13, 2012

MY ADDICTION APPARENTLY - THE COMPUTER

Guess what MY addiction is???? All of you on Addison's Page!! My mom is going to read this so - sorry mom! I just had to say hello to everyone. And I figure, what's wrong with saying hi, I'm in the BED, and I don't have anything else to do on my weekend of rest! Thank you all for your posts of encouragement yesterday. I still feel a bit weird physically, but mentally and emotionally I already feel better - it's weird, but in a very good way.
I KNEW that I needed to go to the doctor, and that I HAD to do something when I found out that I couldn't go to my horse show this weekend because my horse Cleo has an abscess in her foot (very normal with all this stupid RAIN!) and she isn't going to be ready to go in time. And my response was - "Oh Well"
When I showed up yesterday, at my doctor, who treats my ENTIRE family, he said, "I was wondering when I was going to see you- I've seen everyone else, and I was beginning to worry about you." He asked me what was going on and I said, "well, You'll understand this (bc he's been my doctor for so long) Yesterday I found out that I can't go to my first horse show of the year and I DON'T CARE." He asked if I had been working out, and when I said, NO, and I don't care about that either, he said "Ok You're depressed! That is NOT normal for you!" I've got the number one symptom of depression, (and rightfully so, considering everything that's happened,) not giving a damn about your most favorite things and activities.
As many of you know I promote complete honesty on this page, and many times there is a stigma about taking an anti-deprressant even though so many people take them. Sooooo, HEY WORLD! I'M ON AN ANTI-DEPRESSANT!!! I needed something, and it was either this, or curl up and die in my bed. Not that I don't long to see Addison more than anything, but apparently I have A LOT to do still on this earth.
Thank you ALL for supporting me through the most AWFUL experience I believe anyone could ever go through. Obviously all of you are helping because I CAN'T stay away from you!
Just wanted to say hello, and let you know I appreciate you all, and will now return to "resting" - but I will secretly be checking my phone for your comments on this post (shhhh)
♥

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NOTICE:

NOTICE: This page was created

in honorof my brother Addison.

It is not for public debate, arguing,

or slander. People who have come

to know me through facebook

know that they can share their

stories about addiction or the

addiction of a loved one without

judgment.

Everyone has the right to their

freedom of speech but if you plan

to make insensitive and rude

comments about addicts, which

is very hurtful, go somewhere else

to exercise that right. Feel free

to ask questions about anything

you like, but we will not be

arguing about anything.

We support each other on this

page, share our stories, pray for

each other, and communicate in

a kind and loving manner. Any

negative comments or personally

offensive comments will be deleted

anyway so don't bother.

We are here to make a difference.

To save lives. To come together for

a common positive goal for the right

reasons.

REGULATIONS

REGULATIONS:

Here are a list of the regulations

that I am trying to push through

the TN State Legislative System

for Pain Clinics:

1. Each Patient must have a

Primary Care Physician

2. Must have a TN State ID

with photo

3. Must have a Dr. referral

and CURRENT - MRI, X-RAY,

or CT Scan

4. Physicians must check

the new State Database

prior to seeing each

patient

5. First visit, and subsequent

RANDOM drug testing

(This will not only test for

illegal substances, but also

ensure the drug they are

being provided is actually

in their system

6. Use the Addiction Risk

Assessment Form for

each patient

7. Physician must be on site

100% of the time

8. NO MORE 60-90 day

prescriptions written

Finally, I KNOW that we need

pain medication. I KNOW that

there are people suffering chronic

pain on a regular basis and they

NEED pain management. I am

not trying to prevent legitimate

patients from getting what they

need.

All that I am trying to do is to

REGULATE the prescribing and

dispensing of narcotics so that

those that NEED it, get it, and

that there aren't THOUSANDS

of pills on the street readily

available to any kid (or adult)

with enough cash to buy it.

PILLS

This poem was shared with me in a private message by someone on FB that has suffered addiction and watched the devastating effects of pills. I don't know who wrote it but if you are experiencing this battle right now, you will realize how this embodies pill addiction PERFECTLY. If you aren't or haven't experienced this horrible epidemic, after reading this I hope you can understand better what addicts go through, because this is EXACTLY what pills do to them. Thank you so much Sean for sharing this. It is so powerful and so true.

PILLS

I destroy homes, tear families apart,
take your children, and that's just the start.

I'm more costly than diamonds, more costly than gold,
the sorrow I bring is a sight to behold,
and if you need me, remember I'm easily found.
I live all around you, in schools and in town.

I live with the rich, I live with the poor,
I live down the street, and maybe next door.
My power is awesome; try me you'll see,
but if you do, you may never break free.

Just try me once and I might let you go,
but try me twice, and I'll own your soul.

When I possess you, you'll steal and you'll lie.
You do what you have to just to get high.
The crimes you'll commit, for my narcotic charms
will be worth the pleasure you'll feel in your arms.

You'll lie to your mother; you'll steal from your dad
When you see their tears, you should feel sad.

But you'll forget your morals and how you were raised,
I'll be your conscience, I'll teach you my ways.
I take kids from parents, and parents from kids,
I turn people from God, and separate from friends.

I'll take everything from you, your looks and your pride,
I'll be with you always, right by your side.

You'll give up everything your family, your home,
your friends, your money, then you'll be alone.
I'll take and take, till you have nothing more to give.
When I'm finished with you you'll be lucky to live.

If you try me be warned this is no game.
If given the chance, I'll drive you insane.
I'll ravish your body; I'll control your mind.
I'll own you completely; your soul will be mine.

The nightmares I'll give you while lying in bed,
the voices you'll hear from inside your head,
the sweats, the shakes, the visions you'll see;
I want you to know, these are all gifts from me,

But then it's too late, and you'll know in your heart,
that you are mine, and we shall not part.

You'll regret that you tried me, they always do,
but you came to me, not I to you.
You knew this would happen. Many times you were told,
but you challenged my power, and chose to be bold.

You could have said no, and just walked away,
If you could live that day over, now what would you say?

I'll be your master; you will be my slave,
I'll even go with you, when you go to your grave.
Now that you have met me, what will you do?
Will you try me or not? Its all up to you.

I can bring you more misery than words can tell.
Come take my hand, let me lead you to hell.

WELCOME!

Friday, April 13, 2012

MY ADDICTION APPARENTLY - THE COMPUTER

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